What is Professional Isolation? And why does it commonly effect Counsellors and Psychotherapist to a greater degree?

 

It would be wrong to assume that professional isolation is just an outcome of working alone. Or that it means you are spending too little time with friends having general chit chat about your day; the problem is much more complex and nuanced than that.

 

There is much we miss out on in our professional life, when we miss out on contact with others working in the same field as ourselves. 

Specialists in a range of professions have concerns about their lack of communication and collaboration.

 

Professionals are feeling more isolation, missing not just the fellowship but also giving and receiving support and spending time with people who ‘get’ what it is we do during our day.

 

Additionally, we are likely to be missing out on shared information and perspective too, the so-called hive brain.

We are not unique in facing professional isolation, but maybe we are more likely to be affected by it

We shouldn’t feel it’s unusual to want professional fellowship and camaraderie.

 

Problems of professional loneliness are being highlighted amongst Surgeons and Doctors for instance, driven in part by the lack of opportunities to get together with colleagues in a way that they used to in a Doctor’s mess.  In April 2019 the British Medical Council said that Doctors were being affected by a lack of camaraderie in their working lives. Caused in part by eating their lunches alone at their desks.

 

Does that strike a cord with you?

So when does Professional Isolation effecting therapists start?

Perhaps when we started training. 

 

 

 

In those heady early days, we are buzzing with excitement after each new learning day. Full of enthusiasm to tell our friends and loved ones about the theory we’ve learned,  we can often see the shutters of interest firmly closing.  Eventually we realise,  if they had wanted to be therapists they would have signed up to the course with us.

girl, portrait, woman

Our training changes us and it doesn't go unnoticed.

Our special people can also get a little hacked off when we start to live and breathe our newly found counselling skills. 

 

While we are happily relating empathically at full power to anyone, even strangers asking the time,  understandably it doesn’t sit so well with our loved ones. 

 

We eventually we get the message to turn the counselling volume down, and that’s as it should be. Nevertheless, we start to change on the inside, who we are, and how we think about things. Sometimes family and friends say they want the old you back. That would be a good trick wouldn’t it!

While in training, we were protected somewhat from the full effects of  professional isolation, we had our study buddies around us to mask it full effects  that the high degree of confidentiality we offer our clients will mean.  

 

 

With our fellow students we can share the challenges of the course and theory and the difficulties balancing home and study. We even get to share deeply about how we’ve changed, our personal development, brought on by the training.

 

When we qualify, waving goodbye to our fellow students and tutors, and step out into the world to practice, is when the isolating nature of the work can come into focus.  

 

Certainly, fully absorbing the requirements of confidentiality is when we realise,  for most of our working lives, as therapists, we are the faithful silent repositories of our client ‘stuff’ and so much more.

 

Have you taken our quiz to find out if you are Professionally Isolated?

Answer these questions to find out.

 

Question 1.

 

You are having a meet up at a local café with your friends, a dentist, an estate agent, and a tailor. You all catch up on family news and the discussion turns to work. The friends are sharing stories about clients missing appointments. Do you?

 

A. Duck out the conversation – your friends are getting some of their frustrations out, good for them – but missed appointment usually mean there is more going on for your clients than you know. But missed appointments do happen to you, They do affect your income, and can stop you seeing other clients who may be on your waiting list. Of course, you have the same feelings about the issue your friends have – plus some, but you keep them to yourself.

 

 B. You listen and sympathise – you give support by giving your attention and give each a chance to talk it out and de-stress. But you do not share your stories of your recent no-shows. Confidentiality dictates you should be careful not inadvertently to reveal any client details.

 

C. Find yourself thinking about a client and the reasons they might have been a no-show, and you feel a little removed from the conversation with your friends because of it.

Did you find it tricky to choose an answer? Don’t worry, let’s move on and see how you do with the next question.

 

Question 2

 

Your friends give examples of their client’s seemingly wild excuses for not showing up for appointments. Do you?

 

A. Decide to just listen – you can think of a few excuses made by clients that, on the face of it, could raise anyone’s eyebrows, but you’ll keep those to yourself.

 

B. You laugh at some of the excuses your friends share, but still do not join in – confidentiality dictates you must be careful not to share anything that might identify a client after all.

 

C. You find yourself pondering some of the stories you have heard, and the complicated lives people lead. You sometimes give yourself a little mental shake to get your attention back on to your friends.

 

I know it can seem difficult to choose – but let’s move on – perhaps an overview might clear things up.

 

Question 3.

 

Your friends are giving examples of the most ‘stand out’ things that happened at work this last week. Do you?

 

A. Say a genuine Wow! You are amazed – who imagined a dentist needed to know how to do that?

 

B. Make your tailoring friend laugh out loud by pointing out that if shoulder pads are coming back in – you’d most certainly be spotted by a Rugby coach and signed up!

 

C. You think about Claire you saw on Tuesday – Her floodgates opening, a session of little words, the tears from her lifetime of losses, completely drenching, unstoppable, cascades of tears, soaking, releasing, and cleansing. The last 10 minutes with Claire were spent, again not saying too much but smiling, sometimes chuckling together in the shared understanding. There was unimaginable release, there was recognition of healing. It was an experience that lifted you and reminded you why you do what you do. You decide to tell your friends just what you always tell them. You say, ‘No, not much happened this week.’  

 

For those of you that answered Yes to everything, chances are you are Professionally Isolated.

Ok, I’m sorry this wasn’t a real quiz formulated by high academia, but I hope it got you thinking. 

 

The social scenes described in the quiz  show the real-life challenges for counsellors and psychotherapists, like you,  in their daily lives. 

 

Chatting about work is just not something we do, and because of this we miss out on so much support that most people enjoy. When you stepped up to the high demand for confidentiality that the profession demands, how could you know how isolating that would be.  

 

Maybe you  to can acknowledge that while you love and adore your friends and family, there is a part of your life, your professional life, that you have to hold back. and keep private.

 

Imagine how great it would be to just relax a little and chill out with someone who understands your work, empathises with your stories and can follow your processes, with a deep sense of understanding about how this work touches you life, without having to know any details of your clients’ stories. In other words, a fellow counsellor or psychotherapist.

 

And lets not forget we are a pretty amazing bunch, full of unique qualities, humour, wisdom, joy, courage, enthusiasm,. We are communicators, so lets get chatting.

 

I believe I have the simplest and most effective idea that can bring an end to the professional isolation felt by many of us.

 

See you in The Trusty Teapot.

 

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